This is a story about food.
There are some experiences in life that stay with you. Sometimes events are traumatic, others are emotional and some downright funny. Some events are memorable just because, I remember it like it was yesterday. I not sure whether this happened during first, second or third term. But I distinctly remember thinking “Mr Mbava chose the wrong day to steal a chicken”, when [name redacted] and his size 11 Toughees performed a Jet Li karate kick cum Macho Man Randy Savage suplex on his head.
The day started with a dream about something very important, it most likely involved [name redacted] from [school name redacted] and Synergy Nightclub. When from the next cubicle came a growing murmur of shouting voices to disturb my slumber. Mbavha! Mbavha! Abruptly I jolted awake and was stood atop of my bed looking at a half-empty dormitory. With cheetah-like stealth and all the finesse of Jackie Chan in Drunken Master, I jumped into my Weinbrenner’s and bolted for the exit in search of the alleged mbava and the other half of Kudu House.
We ran up the hill towards the Form 4’s dormitory and then past the Deputy Headmaster’s office in helter-skelter pursuit of mbava yacho. Eventually we caught up to Mr Mbava but I wont get into the specifics of what ensued in to order to protect [names redacted] the guilty. However, in retrospect, I feel regret over the events of that morning. No chicken costs the price that unfortunate Mr Mbava paid. Sha, at one point it didn’t look like he would live long enough to find out whether the Y2K bug was really a hoax. I cannot imagine Mr Mbava ever looked at another chicken again without suffering a horrible flashback of that fateful morning.
The story of Mr Mbava has no real significance to my Mazowe Boys High School experience, except for the fact this episode happened on a rice-and-chicken-for-dinner Friday. The day sandwiched between mince-meat-and-eggs-for-breakfast Saturday and beef-and-potatoes-for-dinner Thursday. Let’s just say Friday was the best day of the week – everyone’s second favourite f-word, after to “food”. This was just another Friday with the Mazowe Boys High School Form 2, Class of 2000.